“Fuck, you are perfect,” I tell her, my voice choked. I’m overcome with need for her but I can’t push her too far. I’m curious about her experience, though whatever she’s lacking she more than makes up for it with enthusiasm. She responds so easily, doesn’t hold back, seems just as in to this as I am.
That’s all I ask for, all I want. I know how to have fun and let loose with women. I can’t deny it. I’ve been with plenty of girls, not a one of them seriously and they all understand that. I make sure they do up front. I don’t bullshit, I don’t feed them lines, I don’t want to give them hope. It’s pointless.
When we started college, Shep, Tristan and I all made a vow to each other that we wouldn’t get involved with a woman. Big mistake, we knew this. Why tie ourselves down when there are so many girls available? It’s college. You’re supposed to mess around.
But then Shep fell first, and fell fucking hard. For a real ball buster too, though Jade is the perfect woman to keep him in line. I like Jade. Their relationship seems solid. But I figured Shep was a total idiot for letting himself get trapped. We had one measly year left and he couldn’t even last that long.
“I am far from perfect,” she whispers against my mouth as she sinks her hands in my hair, pulling me from my thoughts.
Ah, Christ her touch feels good, her fingers tangling in the strands as she slowly strokes me, fingertips massaging my scalp. She’s good with her hands. And it’s like she knows just how to drive me fucking crazy, her tits pressed against my chest, all that lacy goodness that’s covering them making an appearance yet again since her tank top has somehow been yanked down. Offering me a spectacular view of her cleavage.
And she has some mighty fine cleavage.
“Have you really looked at yourself lately? Pretty hair.” I thread my fingers through it and push it behind her shoulder. “Beautiful dark eyes. Kissable lips.” I lean in and brush my mouth against hers, pulling away before we can turn it into something more. “You smell fucking amazing.” I brush my nose against her cheek, moving down to her neck. “And I really like this.” I touch the very tops of her breasts, teasing the lace trim of her exposed bra.
She sucks in a harsh breath when I touch her there and I wonder again if I pushed too far. I trace my index finger along the lace, across one breast, then the other. Her head is bent, her hair falling around her face so I can’t see her reaction but I know she’s watching me touch her. Does she like watching?
Ah hell, my dick just got even harder.
“Gabe…” Her voice drifts off and a surge of triumph runs through me. I like it when she says my name. I like her, damn it. I want to find out more about her. I want to fill in all of those mysterious blanks. Yeah, she’s quiet. Yeah, she’s not my usual type but I don’t give a damn. I’m thinking this summer isn’t going to be a typical one for me. Instead of messing around with a variety of chicks, like usual, I think I want to stick with one and explore what’s happening between us further. Crazy but true.
I want Lucy.
But does she want me?
Wrapping my hand around her nape, I pull her down for another kiss. This one is even deeper, our tongues tangling, our bodies subtly thrusting against each other. I can feel my control slipping, bit by bit and I want to explode. Just tear off Lucy’s clothes, pull my cock out and fuck her. Fuck her until she screams. Fuck her until I collapse.
And I never feel like this. Control is the name of the game. It’s what keeps the girls coming back for more.
“Gabe.” She breaks away from my lips, saying my name more firmly now, her hands planted on my chest and she gives me a not so subtle shove. Without warning she climbs off my lap and scurries over to the edge of the balcony, leaning against the metal railing with her back to me.
I sit in stunned silence, amped up and turned on yet willing my erection down and breathing deep to calm my racing heart. What the fuck just happened? She’d been into it. I know she was. So what did I do? Where did we go wrong? Is she mad?
Damn, I really hope she isn’t mad.
Blinking hard, I shake my head once, run my fingers through my hair before I rise to my feet and slowly approach her from behind. I don’t know what to do, what to say. Should I apologize? Offer to leave? I’ve somehow overstepped an invisible boundary and fucked this up before it even started.
I realize she’s shaking and I feel like a jerk. A tremor runs through her, and the way she wraps her arms tightly around her fills me with the unexplainable urge to comfort her. Calm her down. Reassure her that what just happened…fuck. I don’t know. Was it a mistake?
No. Not to me.
Does she regret it?
I hope not.
But she beats me to the punch.
“I’m sorry,” she murmurs, her voice carrying on the breeze, soft and a little shaky. “I sort of…panicked.”
“It’s cool.” I reach out, my hands hanging above her shoulders for one beat. Two. Three. Until finally I give in to my urge and touch her, though I keep it light and hopefully nonthreatening. Thank Christ she doesn’t flinch. “Did I move too fast?”
She shakes her head so hard, her hair brushing against my face. “No. I don’t know. This sort of thing…” Her voice drifts and she inhales sharply. “I don’t really do it.”
I frown, not quite getting what she means. “You don’t really do what?”
“This.” Lucy turns to face me, dropping her arms from around her waist but waving a hand between us. I let go of her shoulders. “This boy/girl thing we have going on.”
Okay. What the hell? Is she trying to say what, she was a lesbian before she met me, or something? Not that I would think less of her. I’d actually find that kind of hot, which means I’m a dumbass guy who thinks girl on girl action is a major turn on. So sue me. “I’m not quite getting you.”
She makes this little frustrated noise that I find incredibly sexy. Pretty much everything she does is sexy. “I’ve never…you know.” Another wave of the hand between us, her fingers coming perilously close to my dick. “With a guy.”
Wait a minute. “You’ve never kissed a guy?”
“Of course, I’ve kissed a guy.” She rolls her eyes. “Lots of times I’ll have you know.”
“But I’ve never um.” She bites her lip, glances around, like she doesn’t want to meet my gaze. “I’ve never had, you know.”
Unease creeps over me. I think I know where this is leading. And if she says what I think she’s going to say, I have no choice but to walk away.
“You’ve never had…what?” I say each word nice and slow, wanting to make sure I get her meaning.
The slightly horrified look on his handsome face is nothing short of amusing. Not that I’m laughing. I shouldn’t be laughing. Nothing about this is funny. Not really. I just confessed the biggest secret ever, one that is all sorts of humiliating.
But the first giggle slips out and it’s like I have no control. Another one escapes. Then another. Until I’ve got a major case of the nervous giggles while Gabe stands there looking at me with that scared, incredulous expression.